Fell off the Wagon. Back on the Horse

If you've been playing along at home, you'll know that habitude is my new word for the new 'habits' and 'attitudes' that I am adding to my lifestyle. Six in fact. Each week.

Hi!

How is it possible that this much time has passed?  I have sat down to write this post about half a dozen times this past few weeks. Because there is sooooo much to say, I get part way through and decide I can't post an unfinished product.  This is obviously not acceptable! I'm sure people have been losing sleep wondering how my habitude experiment is going. ;-)  I do apologise if you have been waiting to read more.  I will try to write smaller posts (perhaps blogging about one habitude per day might be a better fit for me?) I won't know until I try, I suppose.

On a positive note,

the new lifestyle was going great guns.  I couldn't believe the difference in how I felt and looked in just a few short weeks, making a few small changes.  And as always I started with great enthusiasm, only to find by the third week I hit a bit of a wall. Giving up entirely in the 4th! Trying to get my shit together during the 5th to start again.  I actually was going so well, I was pleasantly surprised to receive many comments on how well I was looking...apparently I had a glow; and a positive energy about me. Fabulous! And these were people who didn't know about the habitudes.  So what does one do when things are going well?  If you're me, you obviously freak out on a subconscious level and sabotage any good work and forward momentum you have created and retreat to your old ways. Sigh.

Giddy up - let's go again

I guess it's slightly positive that I noticed

that I fell off the wagon so soon (often I blindly ignore the obvious). And it's got to be a good thing that I'm clambering to get back on said wagon (or should that be horse) again with just two wasted weeks instead of months or years.  It was knowing that I had to report back here that has actually inspired me to keep at this and not give up. So thank you!! I know that these habitudes work, but I obviously need to focus on the reasons I feel uncomfortable with success; and why I feel the need to sabotage good things /feelings that come my way.

For the first time in years,

I had relief from chronic sinus and allergic rhinitis.  The inflammation in my joints disappeared. I was feeling so calm, peaceful and happy by week 3.  Why on earth would I give that up? I was, however, also feeling a little pressure from trying to do all 18 things every day religiously by week 3.  It almost felt like it was too much too soon.  I feel I may need to tweak the time between adding habitudes in order to cement the existing ones in place.

Thinking sensibly

in terms of a long term permanent solution for my lifestyle changes, over a short term fad experiment, I will begin with Week One again (with no shame, or guilt, just the attitude of gratitude of persistence!) incorporating Habitudes One to Six, and I will not add Habitude Seven to Twelve possibly until two weeks later. Maybe three.  I'm going to make sure I'm comfortable before moving on.  This should hopefully alleviate the problem of stopping when it gets overwhelming. Instead, remaining at a level I'm comfortable with until I'm ready to add more.

Yes, I'm making this up as I go along.

Yes, I'm really trying to learn from experience. And Yes, I really want to succeed.  Which is why I am trying something slightly different, in order to get a better result! (You know that old definition of insanity "doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results") This of course blows out my completion date from next month, closer to the end of the year. But that is okay. As I said above, this is for the long term.

Two steps forward, one step back

That seems to be the way I roll!

That is is for today. I will say no more so that I can post this blog immediately.  You can expect to hear from me tomorrow, for sure. Fo shizzle as I like to say.

Ta ta for now

Kylee